I am so tired, but I am not sleeping. It seems like a lot of things are unraveling lately, and I don't know how to fix any of them.
What's worse is that no one seems to have this feeling of panic or dread that I currently do worming its way through their systems.
Case in point: my brother is probably going to lose his job next Wednesday. Like, it will just be gone. He hasn't lost it through his own fault. He sells health insurance plans over the phone. People aren't calling.
I am totally fucking wound about this. I mean, he is supporting a family, they have a bid on a house, and he is supposed to be married in April. I can't even begin to tell you how angsty all this is making me.
It's upsetting to me that I have no power over this situation - - no way to help my brother out.
I guess I just feel kind of like a failure lately. It's not the type of feeling you want wrapping around you at night.
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